Shadows
by Exile Wrath
Summary: "I hate shadows like Moyashi. Silent, polite, never gets in your way, always there. If Lenalee has a bad dream, if Lavi wants some help or someone to hang around with, the shadow is there. But who is the one that he goes to in need or despair?" YULLENWEEK


**Summary: "I hate shadows like Moyashi. Silent, polite, never gets in your way, always **_**there**_**. If Lenalee has a bad dream, if Lavi wants some help or someone to hang around with, the shadow is there. But who is the one that he goes to in need or despair?" Kanda is determined to brighten the shadow that has brightened the lives of others.**

**Exile Wrath: Day 3 of Yullen Week! I hope you enjoy. And also, I've decided to stick in a version of Rei in all of them so that they'll be able to flow easier for me; his main role will be that of either Allen or Kanda's brother/sister (in AUs) and/or a matchmaker between the two. She's mainly there to do the things that would be considered OOC for Kanda *runs to bomb shelter* don't kill me; enjoy! (Warning: Slight OOC Kanda and AU post-canon. Light yaoi, FLUFF!)Some new OCs exist for the sake of getting Kanda to come out of the closet….**

**Theme: Shadows**

**Rating: T**

**Pairing: Yullen**

**Jeniferee is the BEST BETA ALIVE!**

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><p><strong>KANDA'S POV<strong>

"I hate you, Baka-Moyashi."

"It's ALLEN, BAKANDA!"

"Shut up!"

"Why don't you just-"

"Allen!" Lenalee cried, bursting into the cafeteria. "Allen!" We looked up from our breakfast to see a crying Lenalee. "I-I had that dream again…" Lenalee's cries caught the white-haired boy's attention immediately, and he bolted the rest of his food and rushed over to Lenalee's side.

"Don't worry, Lenalee, I'm still here." I heard the white-haired boy say in an assuring tone. "Remember? Th…"

I mentally frowned, thinking over the last few weeks after the final battle with the Earl. In the very end, the two powerful rivals had stabbed each other, with their identical looking swords, in the abdomen. Instead of dying, the Earl's sword switched Allen into Neah, using the Noah's regenerative abilities, whereas the Earl instantly got killed by the Innocence. However, when the Earl had finally disappeared, all the twelve Noah bastards went insane, like at the verge of the Ark's destruction, some running to kill themselves or bashing their heads against the floor or just standing, stoning, and drooling. Some of them, like Road and Lulu-something, in their desperation continued to make Akuma, so there was still no rest for the Order, as usual. But I had noticed something odd over the last few weeks.

Even now, even though the war was technically over, Lenalee had recurring nightmares that were along the lines of either Allen's death or the 14th re-taking Allen. Even I had to admit that both were things no sane person in the Order would want to think about, but Lenalee would get the nightmares about once or twice a week, and every now and then, Allen would open his door and let Lenalee sleep in his bed while he slept on the floor. The first time, Komui activated a few Komurins, but the stupid rabbit and I pacified him. I got to kill the damn robots while Lavi knocked the crazy guy out.

Also, ever since he left the Bookman Clan, Lavi hung out with the beansprout a lot. I mean, nearly 24-freaking-7. Every waking moment, the rabbit would always be in Moyashi's 10-meter vicinity. He even moved right next to his room! One time, actually, when that fucking Chaozii started ranting at Moyashi and calling him "Bakemono!" Lavi tore into the guy. Literally. I already had Mugen crystallized to dice the fatty up, but I swear his hammer came out of NOWHERE and would've flattened the Chinese idiot if he hadn't activated his Innocence. And then instead of the usual Fire Stamp, he slammed it into the ground, and spikes erupted, tearing at Chaozii's clothes. Allen had to intervene with Crown Clown.

_But still. I hate shadows like Moyashi. Silent, polite, never gets in your way, always there. If Lenalee has a bad dream, if Lavi wants some help or someone to hang around with, the shadow is there. But who is the one that he goes to in need or despair?_ I mused during my meditation. I stood up; joints cracking, and then the lotuses appeared again. Ever since he died, Alma would visit me, or I'd dream of my previous life. I still wasn't so sure if it was really Alma that was coming to see me, but whatever, he provided comic relief from the insanity in the Black Order.

**So Allen's a shadow, huh?** Alma asked sarcastically. I raised an eyebrow quizzically at the hallucination that was caused from me being an Artificial Exorcist.

"Think about it." I said back, lips curled slightly upwards. I always enjoyed a good banter. "He's always THERE, not necessarily by choice, and he comforts everyone that needs him."

**But still, Yuu-kun. A shadow? How…unimaginative.** He laughed. Giving him a stink eye, I crossed my arms.

"Shut up. I don't need a hallucination to tell me that." I snapped back. Alma laughed even harder.

**I can't wait to see your face when you realize your feelings!** He cried, and the illusion vanished. I snorted and tightened my ponytail, exiting the training hall, closing the door behind me.

"What feelings exactly?" I questioned to nobody in particular.

At the same moment, the idiot Exile ran into the closed door,

"What the fuck, Kanda?" Rei hissed, clutching her nose. "Here I was looking for you to tell you something, and you- you DOORED me!"

"Is that even a word?"

"It is in Allen's dictionary." She muttered back. "Anyway, Komui wants everyone in the library." At this she vaulted over the balcony, and I heard the distinct yelp of pain as she probably caught her leg on something again.

"The Usagi already warned you not to do that." I yelled down at the disgraced idiot. She shot a glare back up at me.

"SHUT IT!"

It only took a few minutes to walk to the library, and by the time I got there Komui opened the door for me. "Welcome in, Kanda." He started. "Take a seat…LAVI YOU OCTOPUS GET YOUR SLIMY HANDS OFF OF LENALEE!" Lenalee looked up at him disapprovingly as Lavi just slid to the other side of Allen. "And where's Rei?"

"Here." Rei panted, hand on the door. "I jumped to the wrong floor."

"I told you NOT TO DO THAT!" Lavi yelled at her. "Remember last time? You broke your freaking leg!" She leveled a stink-eye at him.

"Don't act like my brother." She snapped back. "And why in the seven blazes are you clinging to him _again_, Lavi?" I looked at Lavi's hands and noticed that yes, my Moyashi was once again in Lavi's brotherly grasp. _My Moyashi?_ I questioned mentally. When was he mine? I was snapped out of my stupor by Rei flipping Lavi across the room and Lenalee getting up to help him. Yanking my arm, the idiot Exile shoved what was formerly Lavi's seat to Allen's right, and she took the left. The Usagi noticed this and threw a temper tantrum at having his seat being stolen, and Lenalee pouted. Komui opened his mouth to reprimand us but he shut it when he saw that Allen was visibly relieved to not be clung on. These days, no one wanted to make Moyashi sad or upset.

After the battle, Earl's sword shattered. Was this good? Yes and no. Yes because his sword shattering meant at least another few millennia before he came back, but the sword fragments were now embedded in Allen's already weak body. Not only was he a parasite-type, a General, and the 14th Noah's container that already had a short lifespan, now there were pieces of dark matter in his body, consuming him. He ate even more these days, since his Innocence had to work harder to suppress the dark matter. The Science Team had wanted to perform surgery, but it proved impossible, because the shards were in his vital organs. So now Moyashi's projected lifespan was roughly 20 more years…and he would probably die by 35. "BAKANDA!" someone screamed in my ear, "PAY ATTENTION!" I flinched at the impossibly high pitch Allen could use when he was mad.

"I think you just broke his eardrums…" Usagi stammered, and screamed like a little girl. I turned around and had a hard time not running somewhere far. Black Allen had come out.

"Does anyone wish to play poker?" he said evilly. "Komui was talking about a deck-of-cards Innocence, after all!" I paled, remembering the one time we had played poker, and nearly jumped at his hands grabbing my shoulder. "Kanda, what's wrong? Why are you so out of it today? Are you sick?" With this his forehead touched mine, and I flung him away in shock. However, I fumbled and landed on the floor with Moyashi between my legs.

"SQUEEE!" Lenalee squeaked. I turned around to see Rei facing the wall with a traumatized look, Lenalee covering her face a looking at us through her fingers, Komui doing the same, and Lavi's headband had suddenly slipped down, covering his eyes. "GET A ROO- I MEAN STAY HERE! DON'T GET A ROOM!" The two of us blushed, realizing the awkward position that we had ended up in. I scrambled to my feet and helped Allen up.

"I. Am. Not. Gay." I hissed, painfully aware of the heat that made my face red. "And if you two can't get out of your mental Fujioshi Road, I'm leaving." With that, I stormed out of the library. The moment the great doors slammed shut behind me, I fled for my dignity to my room.

"Hi Kanda." The 3 people in my room greeted me.

"Is the meeting over yet?" The annoying redhead asked.

"I bet'cha that he ran out." The blue-haired girl replied through a mouthful of chips.

"Something to do with Allen, I guess." The blond boy that was reading a book on my bed announced. My red face turned purple; I saw it in the mirror.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM!" I roared, grabbing Kaen, Mizu, and Raikou respectively and chucking them unceremoniously out of my sacred space. "AND WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT EATING IN MY ROOM, HUH?"

"Oops." Mizu said, sauntering away down the corridor. "I forgot. And when are you going to come out of the closet?"

"Ditto." Kaen dared to utter as he walked behind her.

"I mean, it's funny and all seeing you get flustered around Allen…" Raikou followed suit.

"But seriously, admit your feelings already, person-who-jacks-off-moaning-Allen's-name." They chorused, and fled for their lives at the last syllable.

"Hey, brother, would Allen-san be the seme or the uke?" Glutton asked a safe but hearable distance away.

"Depends," Bibliophile responded.

"On who comes out of the closet first." Arsonist added.

I didn't hear the rest of their conversation, having decided it was best for my sanity to shut the door while I could. "What are they talking about?" I muttered angrily to myself. For a while I did exercises and maneuvers in my room. "And what to do…"

**Anyway, Yuu-kun, have you decided how to help your…"Shadow"?** Alma asked, and lotuses surrounded me the second time that day.

"Why would you care?"

**Because I'm BORED!** He exclaimed.

"Che. Anyway, I'll just treat him nicer than usual. Happy?"

**That's not enough!**

"What?" I demanded, sitting up on my bed. "Then what am I supposed to do?"

**Yuu, what does he lack? **Alma retorted, happy smile gone. I shrugged.

"How the fuck am I supposed to know the feelings of a shadow?" I snapped back. Alma stepped back and shook his head exasperatedly.

**Kanda…you're just beyond hope.** Alma said a final time and dissipated. I relaxed and laid back in my bed, deciding that 9:00 at night was late enough for me to go to sleep.

I woke up 4 hours later to a timid rapping at my door. "Who is it?" I asked irritably, throwing off my bedcovers and getting up to wrench the door open. "What the fuck? Moyashi, what do you want?"

Allen Walker was sitting at the railing, eyes wide open and obvious bags under his eyes. He wore nothing but an undershirt and some cotton pants. "Can I sleep in your room, Kanda?" I hesitated, my initial reaction being to slam the door in his face and ignoring the request. But the other side, the one that had taken notice of the Shadow, said to be nice and let him in. I wavered, but the beansprout assumed the worst. "Never mind…I'll go ask Rei." When he stood up to leave, I sidestepped, grabbed his wrist, and tossed him on my bed.

"I'll sleep on the floor. You take the bed. Lavi and Lenalee must have been wearing you down for a while." The moment the words left my mouth, I regretted them. I wasn't supposed to let him know that I've been observing him!

"…" Allen sat there, shocked by my kindness. "Thank you, Kanda. Thanks for noticing." In a few moments he had collapsed and I heard soft snores from the angelic figure on my bed. I whacked my forehead. First I called him mine and now angelic? Standing up, I slipped out of my room and strode to the training hall to meditate, and was surprised to see the saltshaker sleeping standing up. Again.

"What the heck? What is with you and falling asleep in random places?" I muttered, shaking her gently. When she didn't wake up, I activated Mugen and made to slice her. The killing intent woke the Viet immediately, and she blocked my blade with her Death hand. "Are you awake yet?"

"Trauma…yaoi…Allen…Kanda…confession…" I heard her mutter. "Damn…fujioshi…" I flinched at the phrases. "Poor…guys…"

"Wake UP!" I yelled into her ear.

"Holy…SHIT, KANDA, what are you doing!" Rei cried, falling over. "What the heck do you want?"

"Explain what you were muttering about!" I hissed. "NOW!"

"Fuck no." I shook her again, rattling her teeth. "Fine. Haven't you realized how Allen looks at you? Or us? How dense do you GET?"

"I'm not dense; you're just being overly subtle." I snapped.

"He loves you."And with that her Death hand pummeled into my stomach. "Screw you; if you break him even more, I'm going to Purge Hunt you. And Lavi will use his new Earth Seal. And Lenalee, Komui, Mizu, Kaen, - the rest of the Order will crucify you. He's not like a shadow that you step on, Kanda. This war is over, and his life will be too, in twenty years. So do something, _or die._" She hissed, voice reaching new levels of malice. With that she punched my gut again and staggered off tiredly. I didn't bother to chase her for more information.

_The Shadow loves me?_ Was the thought that ran around my head. I stood up from the spot I had fallen, and something slammed onto my head. _What?_

". KANDA WAKE UP!" Someone yelled into my ear. My head snapped up and my eyes wearily opened to see the soft rays of sunlight entering the training hall. "Kanda, get up."

"Nngh." I moaned. "Don't want to get up." There was an exasperated sigh.

"Kanda." The voice warned. "Get up before I do something I regret." My eyes opened halfway, and I could barely see the fuzzy silhouette of my Shadow.

"Fine, I'll…get up." I said sleepily,standing up in a way that purposely caused my lips to brush lightly against his.

"SQUEEE!" I heard once again somewhere nearby. My eyes snapped open as someone grabbed my body and hugged me. I found myself kissing…the Moyashi. Disgusted, I jumped up and shook him off, activating Mugen and putting it at his throat.

"What was that, Moyashi?" I hissed with revulsion. I was about to continue but then I remembered that I was supposed to be decently NICE to the shadow. So instead, I just straightened up and let him off with a glare. Storming off, I went to my room, unaware of the hell I had just activated.

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><p><strong>REI'S POV<strong>

"I say we ambush him." I snarled to Lavi, whose eyes were glinting in fury. Next to me, Lenalee was kicking a Kanda-shaped dummy, Mizu, Kaen, and Raikou were plotting creepily, and Komui was giving instructions to some of his new Komurins. These past weeks, Kanda had been behaving in a thoroughly confusing manner, alternating between being abnormally kind to outright bitchy to our mutual friend Allen. The poor guy was so confused that he didn't know how to react to Kanda's behavior, going to the point of retreating into his room and having Jerry deliver food to him. But KANDA would offer to deliver the food. Kanda! He was acting so out of character that Lavi had resorted to calling him Yuu-chan more often to check whether it wasn't a Noah impersonating him!

As for Allen…he was so confused. It had been a month ago that the Fujioshi Fanatics (as Lavi and I had dubbed them) had gotten Allen halfway out of the closet. So here we were, plotting ways to punish Kanda for messing with Allen's head, intentional or not. "I say…" Lenalee began dramatically. "That we fake a crisis that somehow leaves the two of them _alone_ in the _same room_." The other yaoi-philes squeaked with delight at the idea, and Kaen, Raikou, Lavi, and I facepalmed.

"So, what's the crisis going to be?" Mizu asked excitedly, a blue blur as she ran around the room due to her sugar rush. Lenalee pointed at a confused Komui.

"The answer: Komu-Vitamin D." She pronounced with finality. Lavi and Kaen exchanged glances warily.

"What's Komu-Vitamin D?" Kaen asked, question marks around his head nearly visible.

"We're dead meat." Lavi answered vaguely. "I suggest you run for your sanity now." But before said boy could flee, Lenalee grabbed his and Lavi's wrist.

"Don't worry, Lavi! We aren't actually going to take it! We're going to _fake it._" She said deviously, leading to all-around blanching of faces in the room. "Well, only the herders will fake it." walking out of the room and tossing a bottle up and down, I blinked once at Lenalee's retreating form.

"Is it just me or is Kanda going to murder us after he gets together with Allen?" At this, Mizu quit running around and veered next to me, shaking her head.

"Nope. That'll be AFTER he gets Allen laid." She said happily.

_Yep. We're screwed._

…

It was a disaster…that surprisingly managed to work out. By simply lacing food with Komu-Vitamin D, everyone once again got infected, much to Lenalee's delight. Cloaked, we had lured the zombielike Finders and Exorcists to Allen's room, where Kanda had been standing, Allen's food gurney next to him and knocking on the door. Taking advantage of his shock, several innocents charged the swordsman, who simply busted down the door, shoved in the food cart, and barred it. Several of the zombies Innocence had activated, and Crown Clown and Mugen were used to defend against us. In my left hand I held Timcampy, and Lenalee held Kanda's golem, so they couldn't call Bak and ask for help. We drugged the zombies asleep, and had decided to stake out the room, surrounded by zombies so if either tried to escape…they'd be chomped. Sighing, I looked at my wristwatch. We had been sitting here for almost a fucking two hours. Suddenly, we heard a moan coming out of the target's room. Freaked out, I parkoured to my room, praying that Kanda would not kill us. Lavi used his hammer, Rai used his Lightning Innocence, and Kaen swung around on chains to escape the scene, while Lenalee, Mizu, and other miscellaneous fujioshi's stayed to listen raptly to the sounds. I shuddered in my blankets.

"_How are they SANE?"_

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><p><strong>ALLEN'S POV – just before the zombie chaos<strong>

I was confused. My head was muddled and I probably wasn't thinking right. Banging my forehead against my pillow, I thought about my feelings. Again, probably for the 30th time that day, I thought about Kanda Yuu. I pinched the bridge of my nose at the thought. _He's so straight that he makes poles look bent, he's damn SEXY, he can cook, he doesn't care about my curse, and he most likely would hate me if he found out._ I banged my head again, not wanting to think about the object of my affections. But it was hard, seeing that in THREE MINUTES he'd be knocking on my door to deliver dinner. _Why is he being so…moody? It doesn't make sense. One day we'll bicker more than usual, the next day he'll be…a perfect GENTLEMAN! It doesn't make sense!_ I mentally ranted. It wasn't fair. Kanda had been so flippantly odd lately that I had holed myself up in my room. His rapid changes and mood swings were confusing my feelings. The question was simple: do I love him or do I not? Speak of the devil and he shall come; I heard Kanda's customary knock on the door: three taps, pause, and 2 punches to the wood.

"Open up, Moyashi. Dinner's here." I heard him call from outside. I sighed to myself, making sure to position myself in a way that I could kick him out the moment the food was safely inside. But instead, I heard groans and moans of what reminded me…of the Komu-Vitamin D incident. I just shrugged it off, shooing away the gnawing worry that had budded. _I don't care whether he gets bitten or not…_"MOYASHI! OPEN UP GODDAMNIT!" I hear his voice right outside the door, separated from me by only 3 inches of wood. Suddenly he began pounding on the door. "HURRY UP OR I'LL TOSS YOUR FOOD AWAY!" Now THAT, by my standards, is unforgivable. I pulled the door open quickly, and he rushed in with the food carts. Right behind, just a few meters away, I saw the sight of Finders, Exorcists, and Scientists alike crawling towards the door, obviously infected by the same damnable liquid Komui had made us before. I listened to my instincts and reflexively slammed the door shut.

"Clown Belt!" I called, and my Innocence activated, white strands binding the door securely. I wiped my brow, sweating nervously.

"…Nice job, sprout." Kanda said. I froze and decided to dismiss it. He had been like this all week, confusing me constantly. I decided that I'd enough of this god-darn confusion. With a twitch of my finger, Kanda was abruptly pinned to my bed. I advanced on the struggling swordsman, claw held up menacingly.

"Kanda, I have a question. Why are you behaving this way to me?" I asked with an eyebrow raised. Kanda flailed more, glaring at me. "It's confusing."

"Shadows shouldn't talk. So shut up, Moyashi." He snapped at me. _Shadow?_

"Who are you calling a shadow?" I asked with my brows furrowed. Kanda che'ed.

"You. Always there for everyone, But who do you go to when you're down?" He snapped back. I stepped backwards, even more muddled. Then I felt a familiar presence.

**HA! But Allen would be better as YOUR shadow, Yuu!** Alma's voice cheered. I spun around, trying to find the source of the sound.

"Alma?" I whispered, dumbfounded. My Innocence retracted from Kanda, and I stumbled to the bed, mind hazy. "Kanda? I loved you…"

"What do you mean you loved me?" Kanda hissed, hands grabbing my shoulders. I looked up blearily at him, and I felt lightheaded.

"I'm tired…" my mind was getting hazy, as I stumbled on my bed.

With the little bit of consciousness I had, I noticed that Kanda was going insane. I had no idea why. "MOYASHI! What do you mean by saying that you loved me?"

I was getting more and more blurred by the second, and I really didn't know what to think, so I stayed in my sprawl on the bed and waited for sleep to take me. But no, Kanda wouldn't let me sleep in peace; he grabbed my shoulders and shook me. "Answer me, baka moyashi!"

Lazily, I flapped my infected hand at him. "Don't girls always have crushes on you anyway? Why do you seem so desperate?"

**Aaaand here is where you realize your feelings, Yuu-kun. **I could hear Alma's voice again, and I wondered if it was my tired state that was causing me to hallucinate, but Kanda was hearing Alma too, and he wasn't acting weirdly, so… Everything was just so confusing, and I really wanted to just curl up and di- go to sleep, so I tried to shake out of his iron grip and sink back onto the fluffy surface on the bed. Unfortunately, that wasn't going to come true anytime soon.

I was wondering why Kanda wasn't shaking me anymore, just gripping onto my shoulders, when I looked into his face and realized that he seemed rather stunned. Then he dropped me. Internally, I was screaming FINALLY!, but then my conscience didn't let me go, and I knew that something was up.

"Eh, Kanda. What's wrong?"

There was a pause, a hesitance, a silence.

And then he grabbed me again, this time… in somewhat an awkward embrace? Huh? Was Kanda Yuu hugging me? Then bashfully, he rammed his mouth against mine. I could feel heat emanating from him, and he felt like he was putting so much into his kiss…

I wasn't so sure if I was imagining things, but he was right there, and I could feel him. Then he turned to whisper in my ear,

"Moyashi. Be my shadow."

And even though that might not have seemed like a very romantic thing to say, it was probably the best sentence that had ever been spoken. To me.

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><p><strong>A.N. I'll leave the rest to your imagination. Fufufufufufu. Jeniferee is the best beta in the world, once again. <strong>

**Review?**


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